Getting Things Done Before I Have To

Hello you princes of Maine, you kings of New England,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps. Today I’ll talking about getting things before I have to.

So, today is going well so far. I’ve already organized some of my files for work and I have a few more clients to call before the day is over. Now, I don’t have to call these clients, no one is going to get on my case if I don’t. I just want to do it because calling them could mean extra income for me. I estimate that I have about ten phone calls to make before I’m through. Each call will be 15 minutes, so that’s about 2 hours and 30 minutes of work. Not bad.

I’m also getting things done in my personal life. I’m going to spend my lunch time reading a book and also working on my lifestyle business checklist. I’m also going to finish this blog post and organize my day. These are all things that I need to do today and I plan on doing them before I get home tonight.

Thanks for listening!

 

Some Things Are Great and Other Things Are the Opposite

Hello you sultan of swing,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps.  Today’s post is going to be a little different. I’m going to spend this time listing some things that are going well, and some things that are not going so well. Here goes nothing.

Things that are going well:

  1. Drumming – I just had a really good drum day. I made up a new fill today and some new grooves. I was even able to add them to the grooves that I was already playing. Drumming has been good for me lately, I’m practicing steadily and I’m progressing with my doubles as well as grooves. Pretty soon, I’ll have my own songs and a guitarist to play with. We’ll be a band. It’ll be mainly my band and the other guy will help out.
  2. My mood – I’ve been in a good mood for the past 2 weeks.
  3. Working on business – I’ve been working on my lifestyle business checklist/mind map steadily and I’m about 1/4 done. I did have a hiccup yesterday when I didn’t work on it like I was supposed to. I gave myself the day off though because I was watching a movie to celebrate Halloween. I shouldn’t have given myself the break, though.

Things that are not going so well. This is not negativity. This is a critical examination to find areas that I can improve upon.

  1. Working on business- I need to stop skipping work sessions. I gave myself one break yesterday and I don’t want it to become a habit.
  2. Scrubbing myself clean in the shower. I need to buy a scrubbing rag.
  3. Reading – I skipped reading yesterday and today. I gave myself a break yesterday because I was watching a movie to celebrate Halloween. I don’t have an excusse for today. I wasted time on Facebook instead of reading and that is just not good at all. ( I literally checked Facebook right now I wasted another 10 minutes of my life.)

Okay, so I really need to read right now. See ya

Procrastinating on Business

Hello my seductive temptresses,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps. Today I’ll be talking about how I’m procrastinating on business.

Today, I have a short list of things to do: writing this blog post, make a Facebook post, organizing my week, transferring music to my computer, drinking 160 ounces of water (not going to do this, I know), reading for 30 minutes, and lastly, working on business for 30 minutes. I’m avoiding this last task like a dog who wants to rip my nipples off.

So let’s break down the task for your benefit so you understand how idiotically simple this task is and how ridiculous it is for me to be avoiding it.

  1. Go to Mindmeister.com and open a mind map file that I saved yesterday.
  2. Brainstorm different questions that I would need to ask myself if I were to start a business.
  3. Add the ideas from #2 into the system
  4. Stop at 30 minutes and save

Simple! And now you see how much of a task it is. It isn’t.

Now I’ll just get to it I guess.

Marcus

Holy Shit Magic: the Gathering

Hello my little birdies, Po-tee-weet?

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps. Today I’m going to be talking about my obsessive Magic: the Gathering day.

I’m in the throes of building a Magic: the Gathering deck right now. A Magic deck is a set of cards that you assemble yourself for use in playing the game. I’ve been making this same deck all day today and I can’t seem to get it right. The trouble is that I need to make this deck for under $100, a tough feat since the best Magic cards are expensive. I’ve tested the deck over and over again. So far, the deck does a lot of stuff each turn but doesn’t actually make me closer to winning. That’s the trouble I think it does a good job of taking control of the game, but even after it has controlled the game, it doesn’t quite have a winning strategy.

That’s all for today. . .  I’m going to go back and work on this deck more.

Marcus

Magic: the Gathering

Hello my sultry savages,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps. Today, I’ll be describing a black hole that I went into when I was -or still am- looking at Magic: the Gathering (or Magic) cards and constructing “decks”, which Magic players do.

I’m really distracted right now with Magic. I’ve been looking at cards now for the past five hours and I’m still not done looking at them. I’m actually constructing a “deck” which is to say, I’m constructing a collection of cards to be used in playing the game. So far I’ve made one deck and I’m still working on my second.

The first type of deck I made is an “aggro” deck, which is basically a deck that allows you to use a fast and barraging strategy. This deck also has elements of increasing your life points. The goal of the game is to reduce the other player’s life points. So, increasing my life points makes me much less likely to lose. The deck also features “token generators”. Token generators are cards that put tokens into the game. Tokens are representations of different elements of the game but are not actually the elements themselves, they function the same way, but players know that the tokens are just “fake” cards that have their own abilities.

I feel slightly accomplished since I completed my first deck of the the day. I also feel like I’ve been wasting a lot of my time instead of chasing leads at my job. They let me do anything I want.

Now that I’ve constructed the deck, I’m going to buy it. This might be confusing . . . By constructing a deck, I mean that I looked up the cards online and made a list of the cards I want to have in my deck. I still need to buy the actual cards. I’m going to buy them after the new year or I’m going to ask for it for Christmas.

Spiraling clouds on a gray sky.

Marcus

Modafinil Again

Hello warriors of the workweek,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps. Today, I’m going to talk to you about modafinil again.

I took modafinil again today, expecting the same mild result as yesterday. I was pleasantly proven wrong. The effect today was much more pronounced than yesterday. I felt a high that could only be described as a floating smile-fest of hurried work and reading.

I was in the car when I took the pill. At 200 milligrams, the pill is twice the dosage recommended by aficionados of the drug. Although, I didn’t know it at the time. The drive to work was my normal in that I was almost dosing off and half-paying attention to The Tim Ferris Show. I arrived at work weary like most days and I took off after ten minutes of desk-sitting to acquire a no-calorie Monster Energy drink from 7-Eleven. I downed the thing in five minutes.

About an hour later, I noticed that I was in heady mood. My temperament became cheerful and my attitude followed suit. All anxiety and tiredness and laziness vanished from my fat Asian body. Smiling to myself and excited to be alive, I got to work without a hitch.

I offered two of my coworkers the pill and one of them explained a different experience than I had, however. He said that he was feeling like he was in a tunnel and that his focus was narrowed to the extent that it bothered him. He’s on crack.

The effect wore off about an hour later and I began to feel tired and moody.

This shit doesn’t last long enough.

Marcus

Modafinil

Hello you juggernauts of jive,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps. In this episode, I will be talking about my first experience with modafinil, which happened today of all day. Apropo.

I was on my way home from work when I remembered that I had a package waiting for me at the post office. Ever since I had received the notice from the post office, I had been hoping it was the modafinil that I ordered. I ordered it online from the UK and it took a while to get here. So I was really excited when I found out that I had a package.

I got to the post office and opened the package to find 3 strips of pills in metallic foil wrapping. I was excited. I stopped at a gas station, bought water, and promptly popped the pill into my hungry pill hole. All I had to do was wait.

I got home with some time to kill before drum practice so I decided to watch How I Met Your Mother for about 20 minutes while I waited for practice and for the pills to kick in. When drum practice rolled around, nothing had happened -no head change or anything. I sat on my drum throne, questioning whether I was feeling the effects or not. Unable to read myself properly considering a possible placebo effect, I started to play. I immediately noticed that I was having way more fun that usual. I was excited to play, like I hadn’t played for a month. The music was excreted from my musical asshole in a most jovial way. I could even play a groove that had been giving me trouble up till yesterday. Things were good. I didn’t feel any more concentrated or focused. I did feel an extra awareness of my surroundings, though, however minutely it might’ve been. I finished messing around slash warming up and started to practice doubles in my left hand. Things went quiet in my drum booth except for frequent bursts of three on the snare drum. After an hour had passed, I noticed that I wasn’t in any special mood anymore. I was no longer feeling the elation that I had felt just an hour before. No more playfulness or anything. I guess it just wore off. Bummer.

So that’s what it was like. A mild feeling of playfulness and cheerfulness with an extra awareness of my surroundings. . .

I’m not satisfied at all. It was a waste of money. Haha

Marcus

Things are going haywire 

I’m not doing so well. I hate to say. I started this weekend off badly with a bout of voice hearing. It bothered me so much that I stopped playing drums in the middle of practice. The rest of the weekend followed suit.  Here’s wax let what went wrong:

1) couldn’t sleep Friday night because I was hearing voices. Dis lily passed out at 4am

2) took a nap for way too long after my drum lesson saturday. Slept through my drum Practice time. 

3) didn’t read or work on business Saturday or write a blog post 

Bad, bad, bad.

I can’t take this lightly or I’ll start making more exceptions. This is a serious issue

Near Psychotic Break, I Think

Why hello you sexy, sexy people,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps. I will be sharing with you today my experience of almost having a sincere emotional breakdown or a psychotic break or a scary scary few hours where I was experiencing paranoia and hearing voices. That experience happened today . . . just 3 hours ago and lasting until just a few minutes ago before I got my Diet Mountain Dew. I will try my best to be coherent, but forgive me, this is an attempt to describe an experience that literally almost drove me crazy.

So it all started today during work while I was sitting at my desk and overhearing some conversations that were going on right beside me. I was sort of paying attention and then I started to think about how my coworkers might be able to tell that I was sort of paying attention. That led to my supposing that THEY might be thinking, “Well, if he’s paying attention, I would expect him to jump in at any time now.” This would have been fine had I been any other person. But it was me in that situation. And, being of sound mind and spirit, I simply proceeded to stay silent and listen to their conversation with no intention of adding anything to it, all the while becoming more and more paranoid because I was sure that they could tell I was listening.

Now I don’t know why it bothered me so much to think that they were sure that I could hear them. In the past, I’ve always just overheard conversations and drifted in and out of listening with no paranoia or shame about participating. I think this instance was different because of the proximity of the participants in the conversation to me. In the past, I’ve overheard conversations go on all around me, but I never occupied the space between speakers before, which is what happened today. I was caught in the crossfire of words as they shot their conversation passed my head. I felt like a deer in the middle of two sets of headlights.Now if I had any other mind but my own, this brief paranoia would’ve ended as soon as the conversation ended. But no, I have a spectacular mind that is prone to delusions ever since a fateful sales bootcamp in 2013.

So, just a quick backstory, I was at a sales bootcamp for my new job at a dealer for Dish Network. During the trip, I started trying to fit into the group in order to study how it was to be on a team (sounds really stupid, but I actually tried to do this academically. . .  Like a professor watch apes). So I started paying close attention to everyone and how they were acting. At one point, it seemed like everyone knew something that I didn’t know. So I started to pay even more attention to find out what the secret was. What was I missing? The more I tried to get on the same page with everyone, the more I discovered that everyone seemed to be in the same massive conversation. But no one seemed to be talking about anything in particular. They just all seemed to be commenting to each other about random things. And then I started to think that they were all talking in metaphor about each other and feelings. . . Crazy, I know. One memory that stands out to me in particular -this isn’t an example of speaking in metaphor . . . it’s a clear memory of someone clueing me in to what was going on that I didn’t know about. I remember being in the car and someone just having said something, I think it was the girl that was in the car that said something, and then another guy comments, “There’s the feeling, think about it, think about it.” That comment came out of the blue and was addressed to everyone in the car. This was not a normal response to what she had just said. I guess he was commenting on the feeling she was expressing when she said what she said. I don’t know why he said that. . maybe to coach us some how on how to be more empathetic? Anyways. . . this whole trip was filled with moments like that. So much for quick backstory.

So I started having delusions that people spoke in metaphor and that people gave clues to other people about how they were feeling . . .

So I started hearing voices. . . the voices of my coworkers in my head. . . the clearest voice I remember hearing is our receptionist’s voice and my coworker Omar’s voice. Our receptionist Felisha was making comments that I didn’t understand. She randomly said “he fucked it” when I was thinking about my other coworker that got fired. And then, when I was playing drums. . . I had the one coworker that was fired in my mind and I was playing fine. and I could see my coworker Omar egging me on saying that I was doing great and then when another coworker came into my head, I started to mess up and then my coworker Omar said, “you have to play her too”.

So I guess these weren’t bad voices. They were voices of my coworkers and none of them were saying anything bad to me. I just got paranoid that I was hearing them.

I was paranoid that I was acting weird though. . . . and maybe I was. . .

The most paranoid thought I had was that other people could hear my thoughts. That idea actually runs through my head -that other people can hear my thoughts. When I get caught up in this delusion, it really affects my mood aversely especially since I’m such a sicko and think such racist shit all day.

Diet Mountain Dew Again

Hello my fun-loving bipeds,

Welcome to another episode of Marcus Brain Dumps -the blog in which I humiliate myself by spewing out all the thoughts I’m having at the time of writing. This is an exercise is honesty. Sometimes it’s going to be mundane. Sometimes I’m going to admit things that would kill my grandma if she heard them. So sit back and enjoy the show.

Today is another day on which I broke my rule of buying soda. I’m not supposed to buy soda, especially caffeinated soda. I justified it today by saying that I would only use the spare change that I had in my car to buy the soda. And use it I did. I’m almost tired of writing about this since I already wrote about this yesterday, but I’ll do my best to tell you why it’s important that I write about it again today.

One of the reasons I’m not supposed to buy soda is that I want to save enough money to skip work for 4 months while I’m in school. If you read my post yesterday, you already know this. I’m not spending a lot of money each day that I buy soda, but it adds up. If spent a dollar per day on soda from now until the time my semester begins in January, I will have spent 98 dollars. That’s a week’s worth of spending money and I need all the money I can get.

The more pressing issue is the effect that caffeine has on my body. Research shows that caffeine causes your body to release cortisol, the stress hormone. Too much cortisol can result in decrease testosterone production and weight gain. Yuck! Caffeine also prevents me from getting a good night’s sleep. Some people can deal with it. I canNOT. I’ve fallen asleep at my at work after nights like these.

So I’m writing again about this topic because it is an important habit to break and writing about it helps me to think through the reasons why I should break this habit. But all this self-study is useless unless I come up with an action plan that helps me to break this habit. According to The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg (and I’m paraphrasing here) old habits are broken when a new routine replaces an old routine in the habit loop. Now, the habit loop is a three-part process that starts with a cue, goes to a routine of some sort, and ends with a reward. So replacing the routine part of the habit loop is the key to breaking old habits.

I will use water to satisfy my urge to drink something. I often feel tired in the middle of the day and seek a caffeinated soda to pep me up. I will simply drink cold water to wake myself up. I’ll be facing the same cue, being tired, and take on a new routine, drinking water. I also feel bored during the day and that’s also a cue for me to get caffeinated with soda. I will just replace this reading . . . Yes I have a lot of down time at work.

So there you have it. My new plan. Ahhhh my life is going to get so much better. And I’m serious.

As always, thank you for reading.

Marcus