Things I️ Know About Self-Discipline

Brain Dumpers,

I’m not having a very productive night, but it’s bed time so I’m not going to let it bother me anymore. I’m here reminding myself about how to build self-discipline so that I️ wake up tomorrow ready to go.

  1. Control your environment. Sheer will power is no match for a distracting environment. Remove everything that sends your mind off into random thoughts. This includes your cellphone and the Internet. Turn off your phone while you need to work and turn on a website blocker.

2. Self-discipline is like a muscle. Use your self-discipline so that that it gets stronger, like a muscle. The one caveat is that you can deplete this muscle. Make sure tackle the most important tasks first so that you do your best work when your discipline is fresh. Decisions also deplete your discipline muscle so reduce the amount of decisions you make by automating your day as much as possible.

3. Your discipline transfers to other tasks. When you build your discipline in one task, you build your capacity for discipline in other tasks. You actually strengthen the discipline faculty.

4) Watch your diet. Drops in blood sugar decrease your ability to stay disciplined. Make sure to stay away from sugar because you will crash and lose your discipline. Eat slow carbs and plenty of fat. Eat brain food like fish oil and walnuts

5) Sleep is important. When you’re tired, you’re not disciplined. Get nine hours of sleep per night

6) Do something meditative each day to clear your mind and being yourself to the present. A mind-cleanse will prevent you from getting distracted with thoughts about the past and present

7) Encourage yourself. Keep yourself motivated by talking positively to yourself until you complete your goals


Howdy doody, Brain Dumpers,

I’m going to break down the success I’m having with my habits. I really haven’t been reading that much and it’s bad. I’ve probably read only like 50 pages in the past week. . . I’m supposed to read 30 minutes a day which means about 15 pages per day which means  download.jpeg

105 pages per week.  I’m less than half for the week. I want to say that I’ve had no time because I’ve been studying but that’s not true. I have time. I just waste time instead just looking at random videos. So, that’s bad. . .

I also have not been writing blog posts consistently and that’s been going on for like 2 months now. I really need to blog because it’s my chance to reflect on my progress with my life and my habits. So, I need to do that. The Internet pretty much gets in the way. I mean I LET it get in the way. I have to stop. I downloaded an app that will stop me from using certain sites for a designated period of time. It works wonders when I use it, I just dread using it so much I can’t get myself to turn it on. I guess that’s something I need to get used to. Even if I DO turn the app on, I always have my phone to distract me. . . Maybe I should just get a flip phone? But probably not, because then I can’t upload pictures of food. Something I have a good track record of doing for the past 2 years. I really can’t stop. . . it’s too much of my online presence to give up. . . Plus I want to be held accountable for the things that I eat. That was the whole of starting it. I should really be aware of the image that I’m putting out. I should only try to eat healthy food. Really. Except for 24 hours on the weekend. But yeah. . . Not doing all that well with my habits. I should really be drinking less caffeine too. But that doesn’t bother me that much

If I were to list the things that weren’t going right they would be

  • not studying consistently
  • not drumming at a consistent time
  • spending too much time surfing the internet, which is a big one
  • staying up too late
  • not reading enough
  • not going to the gym consistently

I have these reflective moments but it’s hard to do something about it. I guess it’s not actually if I were to think of way to work on these things they would be

  • not studying consistently: schedule out a time and place to study. give myself 1 dollar for every 45 minutes of studying
  • not drumming at a consistent time: schedule out a time and a place to drum. make sure that I stick to my study schedule so that I don’t need to study in place of my drumming time
  • for spending too much time on the internet: turn on the self- control app and turn on the Offtime app after I get out of the gym at night
  • staying up too late: this is solved when I stop spending time on the Internet
  • Not reading enough. This is solved when I stop spending time on the internet when I need to read
  • Not going to the gym consistently: schedule a time and place to go to the gym. make sure I stick to my study schedule so that I don’t need to study during my gym time.

So that’s what I need to do. . . it’s good talking about this stuff because it helps me think about what I need to do.

I just turned on the Self-Control all for 23 hours and 45 minutes. WordPress isn’t blocked so I can still make posts.

I’ll turn on the Offtime app too.


Shitty Job on my Exam

Howdy doody, Brain Dumpers,

I did poorly on my programming test today. I find out for sure next week. I definitely used the wrong counter control variable in the while loop. Fuck. If I miss more than 10 points, I’ll have a B in the class, not good! I need an A or else I won’t get into my master’s program. Shit fuck balls.

In other news, I talked with my sister about building her a Magic: the Gathering deck. I know she really doesn’t want one but I want to make one for her that will make her celebrate like a little girl. WEEEEEEEE! But that’s never going to happen. I think I might just make myself another deck and have her play with that one if she ever wants to play.

In other OTHER news, I’m not going to work out today because I don’t have time. That’s a valid excuse, I need to spend time 4 hours studying tonight and I don’t have time for anything else. If you tuned in yesterday, you know I made the point that working out would help me do better in school. So, tomorrow, I will work out just like normal.



Welcome Brain Dumpers, to HEEEELLLLLLLLLLL!!

Just kidding.

I woke up on time today, but the rest of the day has been a complete failure. After playing guitar for an hour in the morning. I decided that I would have a snooze. I tried sleeping for 2 hours, at peace with myself for my productive music session. Sleep didn’t really come because of my noisy sister.

My alarm went off at 12:45PM, telling me that I needed to get ready to play the drums. I planned on playing, but then I tried to go back to sleep again, saying to myself, “I don’t have THAT much to do today. I can just play drums later.” Again, sleep didn’t come because of my noisy sister. Really fucking noisy.

I got off the couch at 1:30 and promptly got an energy drink. Planning to practice right away. I just procrastinated, even more, vacillating between the thought of drumming and the thought of studying for my exam.

I finally sat down in front of the computer at 2:10, but I went on Facebook. Then, I turned on Self-Control and decided that I should learn about self-discipline.

I basically learned that I need to meditate, exercise, and sleep well. This is the fucking advice for EVERYTHING! WTF?

About meditating. . .

I tried it a few times during college and then again with my various therapists afterward. I didn’t hate it and I didn’t like it either. All it did was rejuvenate me, and I didn’t like the process. Tim Ferriss, blogger, author, investor, podcaster and amy idol, meditates every day and so do the top-performers he interviews.  I’m having doubt that I can realistically make this a part of my daily routine. I know that I can do it if . . .

BRB, I need to feed the cat and scoop his litter. . .


I need to find some specific time during the day I can meditate. In the mornings would be good. . . I can meditate for 10 minutes from 9:40 to 9:50. Perfect. I just set alarms before I wr0te that last thing.

About exercise . . .

I’ve been lifting, then walking 4 miles per day, 5 days per week. I was 5 miles initially but I change it to 4 miles so I would have time to write blog posts. I want to change it to 6 days per week, Sunday through Friday. I know I can definitely do this no problem. I just have to make sure that I don’t make excuses. Today, I didn’t go because I wanted to study instead. But, according to information I got online, exercise helps your brain and it helps you become more disciplined. So, I’m just hurting myself if I don’t exercise.

About sleeping well . . .

I’ve been having trouble getting to sleep for the past 2 weeks. At 10:30, an alarm goes off that reminds me to get ready for bed. I’m usually on Facebook at this time and I’m usually making a post about the good things that happened during the day. . . or I’m just wasting time. I brushing my teeth is more like pulling teeth. I take 2 minutes and I hate it. I delay it as much as possible. This makes me late getting to bed sometimes. This is when I really need self-discipline. If I get to bed late, I won’t get good sleep, and that sucks away your willpower. Vicious cycle . . . I guess I can make my teeth-brushing less painful by watching a video while I brush. Yeah that’s what I’ll do. Aside from this, I need to stop my caffeine intake at about 3:30 everyday.


Fat Punk

Howdy doody, Brain Dumpers,

I’m losing weight fast on the Slow-Carb Diet. I was 210lbs at the beginning of the year and now I’m 197. I’m having this strange feeling like I’ve done enough work and that I can eat whatever I want now. But I know my work isn’t done until I’m 175 lbs. I only have about 20 more to lose! I’m feeling like I am a fat person at heart and that it’s strange for me to keep losing weight. But I know this isn’t true. I’ve only been fat since 2014, and I gained all of my weight that year. I’m actually a skinny person and I’m fit, too. I’m getting this weird feeling like I’m not that excited about losing the weight that I’ve lost already. It seems to be just a routine thing for me now. But I know I will feel a lot better when I look better. I will be more confident about my appearance and I will be able to have the skinny punk look that I want. Fat punks just don’t make sense.


Stayed Up Too Late

Greetings, Brain Dumpers,

Today is sucking ass. If today had a mouth, then it would be full of poo because it sucks so much ass. And it’s all because I stayed up late browsing the Internet for places to Magic: the Gathering, which are the saddest places to get dates.  I didn’t find any places at all.

My trusty alarms harangued me at 9 this morning with their normal petulance. I turned all three of them off and set my phone to wake me up at 10. I woke up again at 10 and set my phone to wake me up at noon. Wake me up when September ends.

At 12:30PM, I woke up and felt shitty. I ate eggs, then a burrito and iced coffee and Diet Mountain Dew. I watch New Girl on Netflix. Then a blur until 3pm. Then some more iced coffee and then a blur till now.

I should’ve studied.

I can’t stay up late anymore.


Ego Armor

Hello Brain Dumpers,

A memory of a phone call keeps recurring in my head.  Three of my friends called me together about 3 years ago when I was in class. The phone call was out of the blue and it was about nothing. They each just said hi and it was really awkward. One of my friends asked me what I was doing with my life at the time. “I’m in college,” I said. “Well, that’s power right there,” he responded facetiously. I guess they called me to be dicks. I saw them once after that call, and now I don’t talk to them anymore besides on Facebook.

I think the call bothers me because it seemed pointless and awkward. Reading between the lines through the lens of my paranoia, I see that they called just to tell me that they don’t think of me highly anymore. I’m trying not to think that. And I’m trying not to care.

Here are some of the things I think about when I need to put on my ego armor:

  • I’m getting much better at the drums
  • I got money in the bank byatch
  • I’m strict with my schedule
  • I’m strict with diet and exercise
  • I lost 10 pounds last month
  • I read on a consistent basis
  • I have a college degree and a professional certificate
  • Master’s degree in progress

Hells yeah.


Nicotine and Caffeine

Hello Brain Dumpers,

I’m getting really distracted when studying. I find myself on Facebook and Instagram and random sites on the Internet. Today, I spent two hours of study time researching ways to prevent gum recession.  I did come to some valuable insights, but I could’ve come to those same insights on a day when I didn’t need to study. From now on, I plan to save all my Internet bingeing for Friday nights and Saturdays, days when I skip studying already.

Speaking of cramping my study time, I feel distracted because I haven’t had nicotine for the past 24 hours. I keep thinking about having nicotine. I stopped on purpose, I’m doing it because nicotine causes your gums to recede and I’m having a major problem with that.  I also feel distracted because I just switched from tea and energy drinks to 5-Hour Energy. Okay, fine -I’ve only just switched in the past two hours. But I’m committed to switching permanently because tea and energy drinks are very acidic, which is bad for my gums. We’ll see how long I last, I hope it’s a long time.

Overall, I think because of these recent changes in my intake of stimulants, I feel wispier, less anxious, and distracted. I still want a cigarette, but not that badly.


Hello Brain Dumpers,

I just switched 0mg of nicotine in my vape and I feel really deprived. I don’t think I’m going to switch back to 3mg though. I’m really quite proud that I’ve lasted these past 3 hours. (3 hours!? that’s it!?) I normally puff away nonstop and I now that I’m not, I realize how addicted to nicotine I am. I think it’s only going to be a couple of days before I’m used to it. The goal is to quit using my vape permanently. I don’t want nicotine to control my life like it is right now. I quit smoking once before in Idaho. It took a couple of weeks but I eventually quit for two years, except for a few months when I was with a band and we all smoked a few cigarettes per week.

I think that I’m going to do it for good this time, maybe. I’m hopeful. I’m already feeling okay on 0mg of nicotine right now. I do crave smoking whenever I’m lost in thought or when I’m facing a mental task like thinking about what to write. I’m at a loss right now and I just vaped.

Quitting is hard, quitting anything is hard. habits that involve stopping an activity are harder than habits the require starting a new activity. In order to stop doing something, you need to replace it with something else. Habits occur in loops that start with a craving, goes to action, then ends with a reward. In order to stop a bad habit, you need the replace the action with something else that will give you the same reward. . . at least that’s the advice I got from the Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. I can think of habit that I formed over a year ago without using this method. I started eating well. I just decided that I was going to

I started eating well. I just decided that I was going to eat well and follow the Slow-Carb diet. I could eat as much as I wanted, I just needed to avoid white carbs, sugar, fruit, and dairy. I ate a lot at the beginning and I really ate a lot of calories. Now, I’m only eating 800 calories 5 days a week! I just started doing this last week, but I’ve been doing really well. I’m going to keep it going until I lose 15 more pounds. I lost 15 pounds since last year and I want to lose 15 more.


Cheating Today and Yesterday Was Not Good

Hello there, precious,

Welcome to another edition of Marcus Brain Dumps. Today, I’ll be sharing with you my remorse over cheating on my diet.

Yesterday, I ate a steak when I was technically supposed to be fasting. I normally fast on Sunday until night time when I eat beans. When the day started, I knew I was going to make an exception at dinner because it was Christmas, I was going to allow myself to eat anything I wanted as long as it was part of our family’s Christmas celebration.  I lasted until about 12pm and ate a steak. I felt guilty about it, and I want to say that it wasn’t that bad of a mistake but it was. You see, I’m trying to form the new habit of not cheating so much on my diet. These first few days are crucial. I cheated today as well when I ate a burger, so that’s not good. I need to keep myself accountable because no one else really cares that much that I lose weight, not as much as I do.

I think I cheated today because it felt weird not to cheat with my brother around. He isn’t strict about his diet and I felt like I would be acting strange if I didn’t cheat. I should’ve let him know that I was trying not to cheat anymore and that I’m becoming more strict with my diet. I think he would be the kind of person that I could talk to about things like this. But then again, I feel like would cheat anyway around him even if I told him. I have to watch out for this when I see him.